Transcript #58: Finding True Peace

Episode Flyer for #58: Finding True Peace

Episode Flyer for #58: Finding True Peace

Guest: Karen Curry Parker       Guest Title: Author, Coach and Human Design Specialist

Date: May 31, 2017            Guest Company: Joyful Mission              


[Intro music]


Debra Ruh: Hello. This is Debra Ruh, and you’re listening to Human Potential at Work. Today, I have a guest that I’ve been trying to have on for a long time but she’s a very, very successful and busy, busy woman. So, today Karen Curry Parker is on the show and I’m very excited about featuring you today Karen, so welcome.

Karen Curry P: Thank you. I’m excited to be here.

Debra Ruh: Karen, you have an amazing background. I’d known about your work for several years and I was doing some research to ask you intelligent questions and things like that and I just became more and more impressed as I went through the loads of information about you out on the Internet. So, do you mind telling our listeners a little bit about your background, including that you’re a mom of five children, right?

Karen Curry P: I am a mom. I’m actually a mom of eight children. I have three stepdaughters too so …

Debra Ruh: Oh, that’s cool.

Karen Curry P: I always have to wonder where are we going because the background is such a patchwork weirdo quilt, but I would say that I love helping people tap into their full potential. That’s my passion, and that’s the piece that I think will bring peace to the world to be honest. My path to doing this work has involved a lot of me learning about potential from the other side of potential, meaning I’ve learned a lot about human potential basically by studying the concrete after falling down face first, many, many times. So, in a nutshell, I started off my journey as a nurse and learned very quickly, after about six months, that I’m not good at taking orders, so that was the end of my professional career as a nurse.
I was always a little bit out of the box. I immediately went from being a nurse to being a midwife, so I worked delivering- … Actually, I worked for the Catholic diocese delivering babies in the basement of the Catholic Church in Austin, Texas. This was during the time when there was a lot of violence in Central America, so a lot of women were literally escaping terrible situations while pregnant and migrating north up through Mexico and landing in Texas. The Catholic Church was giving them sanctuary and we were delivering babies in the basement. Started there, then I had my own kids, and very shortly after having my own kids discovered I couldn’t take babies with me to births ’cause that’s so-
Debra Ruh: So unpredictable when you do that, right?

Karen Curry P: I know. Well, when they start leaning over your shoulder and talking when you have them in a backpack carrier, it gets a little weird. At that point I started having … I had four kids kind of 22 months apart, so I stayed home and homeschooled them for a while. My youngest son was born with some very interesting adventures. He didn’t speak for four years and we went through an enormous quest to try to figure out what had gone on. He had had a very severe reaction to a vaccination and just kind of shut his neurotic neurobiology down, so that led me on a path to really investigate alternative healing because going to the audiologists, and speech therapists, and everything else was not working. So, I stumbled at that point upon EFT, the Emotional Freedom Techniques. This was in the late 1990s, back when we had permed and poofy hair still, and started studying energy psychology. It was really profound.
My husband at the time, his father and I started using these energy psychology techniques with him, and literally within two weeks he started speaking in full sentences.

Debra Ruh: Wow, that’s amazing.

Karen Curry P: So, that definitely got our attention. I started really using that as part of a life coaching practice before we called it life coaching. Then, somewhere further down the line, my first husband had type II bipolar disorder and we spent a lot of time working with some of the challenges that that brought to us. That, at a certain point in our marriage just really couldn’t handle the stress of his mental illness, so I ended up raising these four kids by myself, picking myself up at various points in times; from bankruptcy, to house repossession, to foreclosure and all kinds of adventures in interesting cycles, each cycle bringing me a whole new set of lessons in human potential. Somewhere along the way I was in Sedona, Arizona. I had moved there to study human design, which is the system of personality assessment that I use in my practice and I’ve written a book about it, and it’s the tool that I use to help people really tap into their potential.
Along the way, while I was building that part of my business, I had to work as a psychic because when you live in Sedona you can only do one of two jobs and that’s either sell real estate or be a psychic. I figured I wasn’t good at selling real estate so … And as it turned out, that was actually a really sweet job because it … When people go get a psychic reading, a lot of times they’re not really looking for answers. They just want somebody to listen to them, and to tell them everything is going to be okay. So, I was good at that. That was something I’ve been doing professionally for many years, so I did that, and kept growing Human Design on the side and … Wait. Where are we in the story?

Debra Ruh: There’s still a lot of twists and turns.

Karen Curry P: I know. I eventually moved to Minnesota because living in the mountains in Arizona didn’t really give us a lot of resources, and my kids were pretty sick of going to the one movie theater that was within the 80-mile radius so … I had to drive 45 minutes to make a photocopy so that got old fast. So, we moved to Minneapolis, Minnesota, and at that point in time I — without going into too much details — discovered that I was 43 years old and going to have another baby, which I was totally not expecting, and had a fifth child while my oldest child started college. At that point, struggled again financially, believe it or not, and at that point was writing my first Human Design book and literally rocking a baby with my foot. I had like a little rocking cradle, and I would work on the book and write the book while rocking her and scrambling to put kids through college. That’s the short version. That’s the very short version.

Debra Ruh: But I think the thing that’s so powerful about it, and I know you’re a very successful entrepreneur, but like a lot of us, including myself, it hasn’t been a straight line; it’s been a journey along the way. I also find — and I’m sure you the same way, Karen — that a lot of these trials and tribulations, that’s when we learn the most about who we are and also who the people that we love are around us.

Karen Curry P: I think it’s an important conversation to have, because one of the things that I rally against a lot is that I think a lot of people who stand in a position of leadership in the personal growth industry … I’ve witnessed this many times and I’ve actually walked out of seminars when I’ve seen this gig being played out; who talk about, “Oh, well you just need to change your mindset and you gotta be disciplined, and if you’re not then you’re not ready and … ” They present themselves like they’ve never had a challenge, or if they have, they just used their willpower and poof — got through it. It’s not fair. It’s not fair to present it that way. I always say I’m a 33-year overnight success because it took a long time to get here. The struggles and the challenges, as you said, when you’re in the middle of it, it’s hard to be grateful for the foraging that’s happening of your spirit, because a lot of times you’re just straight out in survival mode. Let’s be real, right?

Debra Ruh: That’s right.

Karen Curry P: But you wouldn’t be who you are if you don’t go through it, and the thing is, you do end up being okay on the other side, and sometimes you forget that piece. There’s so much beauty in the imperfection. One of the things I think is so important is for people to really embrace where they are right now, even if it feels like it’s not gonna end, or even if you think, “Oh, I screwed up royally.” I don’t think there really is any screwing up at this point. I think there’s just twists and turns in the path.

Debra Ruh: I think so too. I remember after a pretty significant business failure on my part … Some of it were mistakes that I made, but some of it, I had absolutely no control in. I was being interviewed and I talked about what happened. A lot of good people lost money including us, and I was talking about the experience. Somebody came to me afterwards and said, “Okay, stop telling people all the mistakes you made Debra. Stop talking about it.” And I said, “But I think it’s unfair … ” because I look at people that are successful leaders, as you’re saying Karen, and they seem to have just somehow … Obviously they’re smarter than me because they didn’t fall down. They didn’t make the mistakes I made. They didn’t do this and … I really think it’s inauthentic and I didn’t want to be that. I want to be somebody that is very transparent about who I am.
One of the things that always bothered me too Karen — and you’ve just addressed this — is that I look at leaders and they seem perfect. They seem like everything has always gone their way. They were born with a silver spoon in their mouth, as some people say, and they’ve just made no mistakes. And I think, “Wow, I’ve made so many mistakes.” I had a pretty significant business failure. Lots of successes but then I had a business fail, and a lot of people lost money. I was talking about it to a reporter, and I was very open and authentic about what happened, then a friend of mine came to me afterwards and said, “Debra, stop telling people about your mistakes. You’ve said it. Stop telling it. Just focus on the positive.” I said, “Well, I think that’s inauthentic to do that. I think it’s very important to note that I’ve had mistakes, I’ve fallen down, I’ve gotten up, bloodied and walked along my path. It just feels inauthentic not to be honest about it and I just don’t want to do that. I want to be part of the solution instead of pretending that I’m perfect and I’ve got it all figured out, because it’s just not true. I’m just part of the conversation and I want to add value to these conversations. Also, Karen, the energy part that you had mentioned; I think that’s so interesting because I know that sometimes when you talk about energy, I will talk about just certain people and they’ll be like, “Oh no, now you’re getting into the supernatural,” or, “You’re getting all woo woo,” or [inaudible 00:12:09]. The thing that’s interesting to me is I feel people’s energy all the time. Maybe it’s because I have a mother with bipolar and borderline … Well, I guess it’s borderline personality disorder, and I guess as a child I learned to read the energies in the room. I would walk in, I could tell what was going on with my mom and whether or not it was going to be a good day for me or a bad day at this time. My mom lives near me now and I still have to read that energy and I have to try to keep my energy. I just think it’s interesting in a way that people are so resistant to that word “energy” when I can feel it every time I meet any being, whether it’s a dog, or cat, or person. So, I don’t know why there is such resistance to that, but I really applaud all the efforts and journeys that you’ve taken, and then used those to try to help people really find their full human potential. So, I appreciate your efforts.

Karen Curry P: [inaudible 00:13:18] We are very deeply conditioned to be logical. We are trained to be logical, we’re fed formulas, we’re educated in a formulaic logical system, and it biases towards thinking that’s the only way to know what’s true. In fact, if you take the “woo woo” out of it and you look at the hardwiring of the brain and really beautiful research coming out in neuroscience [inaudible 00:13:44]. There are a lot of different ways of knowing. In fact, there’s a lot of new research that’s come out in the last two years, saying that physiologically … Like one of the research studies I just read recently was, “If you go to a crap table or a card table at Vegas, your palms will sweat before you know which card to pick. Your body already knows ahead of time what’s the right card to pick, but we talk ourselves out of it because we get all logical with it, right?

Debra Ruh: Right, right.

Karen Curry P: So, it’s not even woo woo, it’s actually scientific.

Debra Ruh: Yes, I think that’s so interesting. I read a book one time by, he’s passed away now, by Edgar Casey. They called him the sleeping prophet. I just thought his work was so interesting, and I read a book about being psychic. I think we all are a little psychic. I remember there was a test that you could take to … Before you turn the page, you could guess what the picture was on the next page. I thought, “Oh, I’m gonna try this.” Before I turned the page, I thought about it and concentrated and I thought, “I think it’s a dog.” And I turn the page, and it was a dog, and I’m like, “Oh yay, I’m so psychic.” Then I failed every single one after. It was like, “Oh, maybe I’m not so psychic.” So, maybe it’s like what you said, Karen, when you became a psychic to take care of your children and everything. It was about people want to be listened to. I think we are also separated. I think a lot of people are alone and sad. Doug Foresta and I talk often on my program about how social media and technology, and all of the iPhones and the Androids; they’re wonderful but they’re actually separating us. I think it’s really causing a lot of pain to a lot of people. So, there’s amazing, wonderful things happening but there is also … Sometimes these things are used in a way that separate us. So, you’ve had experience with your son walking a journey of disabilities and who’s it going to be, and can he learn to talk and all that stuff. We talk a lot on this program about people … We’re human beings and we’re fragile human beings. Sometimes we walk the path of disabilities and it shouldn’t always be looked at as a person that’s broken. I have a daughter with trisomy 21 and we did the speech therapies, occupational therapies, physical therapists. One of the best things she ever did to learn to speak well for her was theater arts, and her theater teacher saying, “You’ve got to project your voice.” She learned so much doing that, that we had amazing successes over those few years that she did it.

Karen Curry P: I like what you say; it’s not brokenness. The way I teach this, and the way I see this … This, again, speaks to not just physical challenges or even developmental challenges, but it speaks to life. The life that you are living is just a costume that your spirit is wearing for whatever reason. If you’re in earth school, this costume is gonna take you on the story that you need to be living for you to master whatever you came here to master. It’s temporary. For us to see that each and every one of us is living this story, whatever the story is, whether it’s, “I have speech impairment,” “I have autism,” “I have … ” whatever. Or, “I’m bankrupt,” or, “I made a mistake and I accidentally … I lost connection with source and I did something terrible and really hurt somebody.” These are all stories that are part of the unfolding of our individual experience and what we need to master on a soul level individually — if you can have an individual soul — and it’s also part of the collective story of who we are together. When we lock ourselves into a mindset of this very strict definition of, this is what success is, and this is what your story should be, and if you’re not living this story you’re doing it wrong … First of all, it’s not possible for a lot of us, that’s not our story. And secondly, what an incredibly boring tapestry that would be. It would be a plain white piece of linen with nothing on it.

Debra Ruh: Karen, how does this tie into … Right now in the world there’s a lot of tension between the different religions. There’s people in the United States saying that … well, not just in the United States … that all Muslims are bad. And there have been times when all Christians were bad. “Oh no, all Jewish people are bad.” How can we make room for people to believe in the God of their choice or not believe in God at all? How do we make room to allow people to be who they are and to really, as you said on one of the … I listened to a couple of your podcasts that you did with Michelle Vandepas, and you talked a lot about waking up to our magnificence. I think that goes right into the tolerance of allowing somebody to be a Christian, versus Jewish, versus Muslim, versus an atheist, versus … whatever. Or, at the same time loving somebody of the same sex. Or, somebody … Once again, whatever labeler, whatever you’re experiencing, how do we make room to allow people to be who they are?

Karen Curry P: Well, that’s a big question. If I can answer that one, I could save the world. I’ll keep it simple as much as I can. Here’s my belief, and this is strictly the world according to Karen. I would say this is one of the many potential beliefs out there that could speak to this issue. I think that we have two distinctly different selves. We have the personal self, or I think sometimes we call it the ego, and it’s that aspect of who you are that makes you who you are in this incarnation. [00:20:21] And then, we have our soul. We have this soul self that’s aligned to a bigger order, a cosmic plan if you will. When we serve the personal self, we serve from a path that is fraught with mistaken motivations and confusion and conditioned desires even, and we limit what we can create. In fact, when you look at quantum physics, if you’re creating from your ego, quantum physics says because there’s so many people on the planet, you’re only going to get what you want 50% of the time because the other 50% of the time, there is somebody else that needs to get what they want and those two needs clash. When you learn to embrace a bigger perspective, and you learn that you have a place in the cosmos, and that your place is a place of service to you — the greater good — and the unfolding of that greater good and you can stand in that place … The way you get to that place is so multifaceted. Some people get there from meditation. Some people get there from a near-death experience. Some people get there from their religion. Some people get there from getting shocked by lightning. There’s a lot of different ways to have that awakening, but when you can serve from a perspective of, “I am part of a greater whole, and my role in this greater whole is to facilitate the deepest possible alignment to the goodness or the abundance of the world,” and you can really wake up every day and go, “Okay. What does my soul want? What is my soul seeking to create?” Then, the place of holding space for others to be on their journey becomes easier and easier.” [crosstalk 00:22:04] I just recently interviewed Master Charles Cannon, and one of the things he said — which I thought was so profound — is he said, “You need a spiritual practice, whatever it might be for you.” It might be just walking in the forest. He said, “Do it every day, not because you need it every day, but you gotta bank it because eventually you’re gonna need it, so …

Debra Ruh: Oh, good one, good one, yeah. That’s very good. While I’m asking you the really difficult questions, what do you think it’s gonna take for us to truly find peace? I know a lot of people are so distressed right now with … I was with my family in Sweden, and we were in Stockholm when they recently had one of their first terrorist attacks. I could feel the sadness of the people. I don’t know if I … I just could feel it. It broke my heart and somebody said to me, somebody from Sweden, “Oh, that’s not supposed to happen here.” I was like, “You know, the things that happen in the US aren’t supposed to happen and we’re not supposed to be violent with each other, and we’re not supposed to kill somebody in the name of our God or … ” It sometimes … especially right now in the world, sometimes it’s so sad. I remember having a tense conversation … Well, I remember because it happened last night with my mom, and my mom was saying, “Did you hear on the news … ?” and this and this and this happened in our city. I said, “Well, nope. I’m not really gonna listen to the news. I don’t want … ” And she’s like, “Well, you’re being ignorant.” And I said, “Yup. I’m being ignorant.” I just can’t handle all the negativeness that’s coming from the news. I wish the news would … and I know some outlets are trying to do this, but if you would give me a more balanced perspective.
If you would talk about the good things; there’s good things that are happening to — just balance it. But all of it is so negative. All of the television programs starting with, “Somebody’s gonna die first,” and then we’re gonna talk about how that happened. I think the negativeness, the constant violence and stuff, it’s really contributing in some way to what’s happening in the world. So, I have ideas of my own, but where do we go from here, Karen?

Karen Curry P: I definitely think you gotta control your environment, and I’m right there with you. Every year we have over 14 million safe airline flights, and we focus on the one flight that falls out of the sky, right?
Debra Ruh: Right.

Karen Curry P: So, there’s that piece. Then, I think you have to just shift your perspective and notice what is working. But I think the other part of it is, we look at the science of epigenetics and we see that we are carrying within ourselves, within our DNA, protein codes that influence the expression of who we are, and those protein codes are created and influenced by things that happened to our families two generations before we were even born. So, we have conditioning in a deep, deep level. We have life experiences, charmers, things that cause us to forget who we really are. And I think on a very deep and personal and very impactful level, the greatest gift that we can give the world is to de-condition ourselves, meaning clear yourselves of the past pattern, of the past pains, the past traumas, the belief systems that are keeping you from being aligned with your spiritual self, your higher self, your … whatever you want to call it; we have a lot of words for it. But clean your energy up.
If you have a judgment, or you have a perspective, or an opinion, or an intense anger reaction … We have that a lot in my house right now. We have a lot of really angry millennials in our family right now. I keep very gently saying, “If you’ve got this feeling of disempowerment and anger and frustration go to the darn bathroom mirror, and ask yourself, “Where is this coming from?” Because if you’re going out to the world and you’re adding that to the world, even if you think it’s justified and you’re indignant, it’s not gonna make the world a better place. You can’t go out there and fight to create peace. You have to align with peace, and you can’t align with peace until you clear your own stuff.

Debra Ruh: That is so powerful, Karen. What a powerful saying. Go ahead. Tell us how to do this, because it’s so true. And what I find, my mom’s my greatest teacher because … my mom and my daughter. I show up and my energy … I’m stressed or I’m like, “I don’t have time to … ” or, “You’re gonna be mean to me.” My mom immediately picks up on that energy and things go wrong. [crosstalk 00:26:44] calm and I’m a balanced and I’m calm, and I’m like, “I love you. I see you. I see who you are. Even if you can’t see it, I see the beauty of your soul.” We have a beautiful time together but I’m always not able to do it, which aggravates me.

Karen Curry P: You’re human. That’s the thing. That’s the other part going back to what we talked about. It’s a daily process. It’s a minute by minute process of staying [inaudible 00:27:09]. It’s not like, “Oh, click your heels together three times.” “I’m enlightened now. I’ll never have a dark thought again.”

Debra Ruh: Yeah, yeah. I was looking for that [crosstalk 00:27:19]

Karen Curry P: I wish that was true, but yes, I think the first thing that you have to do is you have to know who you are. And of course, I use Human Design to help people discover who they are, but I’m not married to that. If you discover who you are by walking on the beach and hopping on one foot with your finger up your nose … I don’t care how you get there, but figure out who you are so that you can make sure that first and foremost you’re taking your right place in the order of the cosmos. Secondly, you’ve gotta know why you think and act the way that you do. What’s underneath there that’s causing you to react instead of being deliberate? And then thirdly, you gotta learn how to be deliberate.
I have to honestly say, and I do have fixed beliefs about this … I don’t have super fixed beliefs about it, but I do think you have to be disciplined, at least at this stage in the development of humanity. We have to be disciplined in ways that work for us, whether it’s meditation, whether it’s your diet, whether it’s going for a walk around the lake, whether it’s communing with people, whatever works for you. You have to have some kind of consistent discipline practice to stay in integrity with yourself. If you don’t have that, it’s very easy for the energy of the world; the newspaper, CNN, whatever it is. NPR, my husband’s got NPR on the car all the time. Whatever it is, it’s gonna knock you off your feet if you have any kind of sensitivity or an open heart. It’s very easy to get discouraged if you’re not consciously and consistently realigning yourself with what I call “truth with a capital T,” which is, the world is good, we’re designed to love each other, we’re all here for a reason, we’re not supposed to be living in the past, we’re supposed to be taking our direction from our connection to source. We’re all here to love ourselves and each other. We’re all precious and valuable. Let’s do what we came here to do.

Debra Ruh: So, Karen, you’ve already really addressed this, but I want to ask this because I know a lot of our listeners are individuals with disabilities or they love somebody. Once again, it’s fascinating because if you look at the definition of disabilities there are so many of us that fall into that. There are so many of us. But how can we … and you’ve, once again, addressed this, but how can we stop the negative perceptions that other people have about us or maybe, say if we’re speaking about it from a disability, how do we let that not impact who we truly are and who we view ourselves are and our place in the world?

Karen Curry P: Again, if I had a pill for this wouldn’t this be awesome?

 Debra Ruh: Yeah.

Karen Curry P: I think the bottom line is, you gotta learn to love yourself regardless of the circumstances. I think sometimes that learning to love yourself means really knowing, “Why am I here? What am I here to learn?” And if you’re struggling with whatever, quote unquote, “imperfection” you may be experiencing, and that can be physiological disability or it can be a depression. That [inaudible 00:30:30] happens too. I think going back and reconnecting to the bigger part of the story … You’re only living out a chapter in the stories. Why are you really here? And really connecting after that. If you can stay with that, truth is … I’ve been reading this thread on my Facebook feed recently about sticks and stones. Really [inaudible 00:30:55] are harsh but words can hurt way more than we anticipate, and way more than we realize. It is gonna be a process of realignment. I don’t think anybody can walk through life and go, “You don’t bother me at all.” That’s not part of being human. But again, it’s that journey of continuing to discover why you’re here, who you are, and the value of who you are in the story of humanity. Everybody has a value, and everybody has a place.

Debra Ruh: I agree, and that’s something that we talk about all the time on the program, because I am surrounded by these really talented amazing individuals and some of them have very severe disabilities. They can’t speak or they have mobility issues that sometimes others look at and say, “Oh, you’re less than me because … ” and the one thing that I love about your work and I really want to understand your work more but … Do you mind exploring just a little bit more? I’m taking this directly from one of your podcasts but, “The science around maximizing our potential and what is really possible for all of us to do.” How do we really tap into who we are? And you’ve already talked about this quite a bit on the program, but any big tips for us on how do we really maximize? [inaudible 00:32:29] that I hear all the time what somebody else thinks of me as not my business, and I really, really try to take that to heart. I try not to worry about what people think about me. But how do we maximize potential? And what is the science around that?

Karen Curry P: One of the things that I’ve done is I’ve created a whole system around that concept right there. Again, I go back to you have to de-condition yourself. You have to change your mindset, which takes discipline. There’s just no other way around it. You have to stay with a practice of consistently knowing how to think and how to think well. Certainly, I would say that’s the practice that we can master as adults with greater difficulty. It’s so much easier if you have parents to teach you how to do this from the start. Unfortunately, most of us don’t have that, but if you can give that gift to your children you’re giving them a huge step ahead. Number two, you have to master your emotional energy, meaning, you have to know how to use it and you have to understand the wisdom and the power of what you’re experiencing on an emotional level, and understand what are your emotions telling you. I think you have to work on a subtle body level, meaning, you have to also clear up the energetic artifacts that we carry sometimes in our energy field in our physical bodies around the pain of lack of self-acceptance and lack of self-love. That means working with acupuncture, flower essences, essential oils; anything that really works on this more subtle energetic level is really important. And then, you gotta clear the genetic code. You have to clear the lineage of what’s come before that’s influencing the way your body is expressing itself. It’s influencing your emotional environment. It’s even influencing your mindset many times. Here is a whole lot of new research that’s come out that shows that energy psychology techniques such as EFT — Emotional Freedom Techniques — for example, which is a meridian-based acupressure technique. If you do those techniques for an hour, it actually shifts you on an epigenetic level, meaning it changes the protein codes that influence your gene expression. If not, we always talk about, “Oh, it’s mindset. You just change your mindset.” That’s only one piece. You really have to have a holistic, integrated strategy to clearing up the stuff that you’re dragging with you that sometimes isn’t even yours. It’s stuff that’s impacting you from the people around you.

Debra Ruh: So, Karen, I’m gonna tell you a story and then I want you to tell our listeners how they can find out more about your work. I’ve mentioned this story on air before but … I travel all the time with my work. I’m really blessed to get to travel all over the world, and every time I was taking what I would call a big trip. So, I’m international, I’m going on a big trip as opposed to, I’m hopping over to Palm Coast, Florida or something. I would get just this fear in my … Like, “Oh, something’s gonna wrong,” and I would just get this fear and anxiety associated with the trip. What I would do is … There was nothing I could do about the fear so I just tried to ignore it and I would just go on my trip anyway, and everything would be okay in the end. I remember one time I was heading international — I forget which country I was going to — and I had this fear and I was like, “What is this Debra?” So, I really leaned into it, and I was laying in bed and I was praying and I was meditating, and I just leaned into it trying to figure out what that was about. And all of a sudden, I remembered when I was a little girl my dad was getting ready to go to a trip to Chicago, my mom was screaming at him saying, “You don’t love us. Why do you always leave us?” And it was this huge, big, big trauma that my dad was gonna go away on business for a few days and, I guess, never come back. I thought, “Oh.” So, in my mind as a little kid, I had equated that traveling on business is bad to the family. I hadn’t even realized I had that, and I thought, “Oh, Debra. How many other of those do you have hiding in there?” So, Karen, tell us. When we have little things like that hiding in there, tell us where we go and tell us more about how people can find out about your amazing work and learn more about your techniques and … Tell us more about your work.

Karen Curry P: Well, I use a system of energy assessment called Human Design, which is a synthesis of Eastern and Western astrology; the Chinese I Ching, the Hindu chakra system, Kabbalah, and quantum physics. What this does, it gives you a map and it shows you how you process energy. It also shows you where you’re more vulnerable to certain kinds of beliefs. Like your energy fields actually has little spots strengths and vulnerabilities and we’re all hardwired in a different way. So, some of us are going to be more prone to say, questioning our love ability versus being afraid to confront conflict. There’s lots of different little configurations that each of us have that predispose us to certain things. So, when you understand your hardwiring, it gives you a … I call it a Rolodex … It gives you a Rolodex of possibilities that you can flip through to start very consciously and deliberately clearing each one of those little pieces. The system that I use is called Healing by Human Design and I have two websites. One is, which is just strictly about the human design system. The second website, which is healingbyhumandesign, actually goes into not just the human design piece, but what you need to do to clear your conditioning on multiple levels including on a physical level, on a subtle body level, on an energetic level, on an epigenetic level, so that you can more closely align with the sole essence of who you are or your higher self and do what your soul wanted you to do when you got here.

Debra Ruh: I know you have 13 books. You’ve written 13 books, right? Or is there more now?

Karen Curry P: I think we’ve capped it off there at the moment. I’m in the middle of actually working on finishing up a manuscript right now, but I’m also finishing my doctoral thesis, so I’m trying to kill two birds with one stone and make the manuscript also my thesis but it’s not working very well.

Debra Ruh: So, how do people find out about your books?

Karen Curry P: I have a lot of books that are for sale on, so that’s probably the best place; just look up Karen Curry Parker. But my Understanding Human Design book, which is a very simple, easy-to-follow workbook about human design is on there. And again, you can also go to or Both of those pages will give you especially a lot of good videos and resources on there too if you want to get started looking at that material.

Debra Ruh: Also, you’re on Facebook and … What about your social media? I’m gonna get your social medias and then I’m gonna let you [crosstalk 00:39:40]

Karen Curry P: I’m mostly on Facebook. Facebook’s probably the best place to find me. I do have an Instagram account. I will confess my kids made me do it. I don’t know what the heck to do with it. I’m not gonna lie. I’m way too verbose for Twitter so find me on Facebook. It’s Karen Curry Parker or Human Design For Everyone or Healing By Human Design. All three of those Facebook pages have great resources and videos on them and information and ways that you can get your free human design chart so you can start looking at, “Who am I?” and “What am I here to do?” and “How does my energy work?” and “How can I learn to love myself better?”

Debra Ruh: Yes. Karen thank you so much for your work and for your time today. I believe work like yours is gonna really help change the world for the better. So, thank you for being on the program today.

Karen Curry P: Thank you very much Debra.

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